sometimes.. dreams.

There are those moments that hold vigil in the deepest, sweetest parts of your memory.
Moments locked away and hidden in vaults of stored up experiences past.
Things that don't surface until something triggers them... say... a dream..

Blast those dreams!!

And then all of the sudden, the things you remember from 20 or so years ago are fresh, and on the surface, and so close to consciousness...

Because of one dream.

The day slowly passes and you remember the dream.
You wonder about could have beens; would have beens,  and should have beens.
All the endless possibilities.
Things that have no bearing in reality now.
It's a dangerous thing, that past.

You think of California sunsets on the Pacific ocean that you never saw in person, but had pictures of.
You think of sun kissed skin and bleached blonde hair from being outside all day.
You think of sneaking into R rated movies - the ones you're not supposed to frequent as a young teenager.
You can't remember exactly how it ends...

What causes such dreams??
Dreams of teenage angst, hormones, that oh-so-boy-crazy zone.
Dreams of people that are not in your life any more.
Because as we grow up, people move away.
People change.
I'm not the same person I was when I was 13.
Nor when I was 18.

I've tasted the awkwardness that comes along with being with a best friend after not seeing them for 4 years and NOT being able to just pick back up where you left off...
It's a little sad just how much things change over the years.
It really makes you feel old, huh.

The past is just that.
And should probably, most certainly stay there.
But there will always be pictures to remember the sweetest things.
Here is a tiny glimpse into my past...



















that was then.
this is now.

So, you just take those memories, put them back in those secure vaults of your memory bank.
And let your dreams pull them out at random for when you may just forget.